Making Oskar
Part 4: The One That Got Away

I glimpse them between trees, their scale all wrong, their species uncertain, followed by their tails as they scurry down holes. They're the songs that got away. In the forest of words, dreams and images where I went many times in search of lyrics for my new album there still lurk half-formed and half-finished beasts. Chimeras and half-breeds, monsters and micro-creatures, they bolt the moment they scent the huntsman seeking them with net and gun. These elusive beasts, exciting to chase, impossible to catch, are the stuff of legend, the meat of a hunter's campfire tales. Don't search for them on the finished album. They won't be there. Here, recorded in notebooks, are their spottings, their droppings, their pissings, their traces. Here are the merest tantalising possibilities, clumps of words in a tangle, scraps of fur in a trap, songs that never were born, dragonflies that hovered then were gone. The ones that got away.

Introductory Instruction
If the songs on this record are too short
Play them more than one time around
If this record seems a little too quiet
Feel free to put up the sound

(First List of Unused Song Titles)

Explaining Pop Music To A Dead Hare
A Small White Milky Discharge
A Visit to the Abbe of Ars
Gonolek Au Ventre Blanc
Edit / Delete
Tape Recorder Orchestra
Plastic Poet
Sampler San, Sampler Man
Paris - Dakkar Aller Retour
The Doll of a Bee
Tatami Catastrophe
Requiem for Laird Henn
Microsoft Humanities
City Racing
Zero Mostel

Ceramics, tweed, air float furniture

Huge / giant guys
I would not like to be trapped in an elevator with
Young Japanese high school girls
Who do not have common sense
Hardly ever go to school
And cannot even say 'thank you'
When they get off the elevator
They don't understand the language Japanese any more

Also huge / giant guys
Who can't even see where I am standing
They breathe heavily from their nose
On my 'wide' forehead

Yohji Yamamoto

I Skate
I skate because my board
Liberates my body from gravity
Which nails it to the ground

I skate, I do a few
Complicated stunts
And so I've started to write / paint / film / dance / do graphic design
This development
Was self-evident

Experimental water
Experimental goodness
Experimental government
Experimental art
Experimental goat's cheese
Experimental dogs
Experimental teeth
An experimental chair
English experimental Water
Japanese experimental air
Explaining experimental art to an experimental hare

Home Studio
Haut parleur
Route du signal

Home studio
Home studio

Now make a record

Ex-coprophiliac, ex-scopophiliac
Ex-nympholeptic sarcophiliac
Ex-sympathetic nippoholic maniac
Ex-gokkun princess bukakke pearl necklace jeweller
Ex-retailer of tales of amused erotic failure
Ex-shrew tamer, Ex-extoller of vices
Ex-tooler, ex-stallion, Ex-scatophile, ex-fooler, Ex-static
Ex-tantric Ex-fanatic Ex-eccentic
Ex-exhibitionist, ex-fisher of men,
This is now, that was then

Ex-wanker, Ex-drinker Ex-backslider
Forward thinker teetotaller Ex-libertine
Ex-fake Ex-rake

The Vocalist
The man who writes the songs
Does not exist
I am real, but
I am just the vocalist

The Turntablist
You're winning now, good for you
But I will turn the tables on you

If Alcohol Enters
Our boss, Kakaricho, is a pain
He treats a human being like a machine
But, ah, if alcohol enters
A surprising theater will begin!

We are a responsible humans
Staff members of the Sakura Corporation
But, ah, if alcohol enters
A surprising theater will begin!

We perform a clumsy acrobatic acts
Breathe fire like legendary dragon, kirin
Feel loyalty for even Sakura Corporation
Would be good, we were drunk all the time
Would be good, we were drunk all the time

Late night on a crowded subway train
Dishonorable thoughts of passed-out women
We are a population in decline
But, ah, if alcohol enters
Re-population may begin!

Feel it burn as it enters you
Sake or shochu, a surprising theater begins
Making everything fine
Would be good we were drunk all the time!
Would be good we were drunk all the time!

Klee Titles
Distillation of Pears
Drawing Knotted in the Manner of a Net
Cooling in a Garden of the Torrid Zone
The Pathos of Fertility

Satie titles and instructions
Things seen from left to right, without glasses
Sonatine Bureacratique

Evian Naive

They're filming slapstick in the Radiant City
It's Le Corbusier versus Jacques Tati
Modular Man versus Buster Keaton
Who will win?

Le Corbusier nil
Jacques Tati 2

The body v design
The curve v the line
Slapstick v Construction
Music hall versus perfection
Modular v clodhopper
The sports shoe versus the clog
Le Corbusier v Jacques Tati
God v act of God

Oriental rugs
Oriental drugs

Classical Eroticism
Helios - Lesbos -
Classical French eroticism

For the liberty of the press

(Second List of Unused Song Titles)

Stockhausen Serves Imperialism
Communism is getting better
Disinhibition and Informality
Triumph of the Will
If Alcohol Enters
The Sinister Servant
Franz Lizst Watching Television
Zero's Nephew
I Am Googled
Knitting The Alps
Afri Cola
Emotional Miniaturisation

International Anthem
Every deity save
Every state in the world
Protect them from (delete as applicable)
From lands where life is slightly different
And therefore totally despicable

We vouchsafe our utter
Unthinking loyaty to whatever
Symbol you propose
To represent our nation's synthetic unity
Its system of railways and roads
Its arbitrary perimeter boundaries
For which some people who would have died long ago
Died longer ago than they would have done, before they got old as they should have done

On behalf of those people (we can't give their names)
We'd like to suggest that nothing should change
We suggest harsh punishments to those alive now
Who go about threatening the status quo

We stand and shall always stand
In whatever they call this place
Heroic butchery will prevent our fall
To some almost identical race

And although a state cannot be said to give birth
Ours is our mother
Although every land has the same stuff going on
Ours is uniquer than any other

And although you have little in common with me
I call you (but not others) my brother
A human is easy enough to create
But can you create a national sport?
A human being is easily made
But to create a passport, now that takes a state
It's easy to make some sort of gate
But do you know the password? The password is 'hate'

Attention Fan
I'm just such a fan of the attention you're giving me

Call Centre Worker
Pamper yourself, you deserve it
Spoil yourself, you've earned it
You jerk, you wanker, you consumer
You work in a call centre

The International Homintern
Homosexuals of the world, unite!
And form the people's homosexual coalition
Be gay for the sake of the common man!
Be as expressive as a man can!
Man equals man
Love your brothers!
Buggers can't be choosers

Scottish Women
Scottish women choose to reproduce with quite the wrong sort of partner:
Scottish men

House as Event
A house you own is a thing
A house you rent is an event

Linguistic children's songs: No Nuts and Silent Letter A

Un beau pub de surgelees sucrees
Frozen sweet foods

I prefer not understanding, or half understanding
But totally not wishing to understand is nihilistic, passive aggressive
So 'trying to understand' might be better
Learning Japanese very slowly

The other, Ulan Bator

Explore ways of being not-American

Burroughs goes into Horn and Hardart

Horn and hard art
Leprechauns and unicorns
In the leper colony
Hillbilly hellsbody

Reading Karl and Groucho Marx
Although it no longer exists
Communism is getting better and better
Reading Marx
Reading Groucho Marx
Reading Karl and Groucho Marx
Towards a Minor Literature
Towards A Miniature Song-Schrifte
Reading Marx with Rainer Ganahl

Advanced Human Being
Christ is a fine-boned feline type, delicate as a girl
Skateboarding around inside a big exploded washing machine
On spin cycle
He is Narcissus in flip flops
He has developed the ability to understand the language of the birds

City Subway Maps
you died, and were trapped
In city subway maps
orange pink and green

busier and busier
cleaner and cleaner
orange pink and green

sports shoes, airports, China

new streets appeared in your city
you saw them in time lapse photography
a flower, fast clouds, the process of the sky
a photo by andreas gursky

you died, and were trapped
In city subway maps
orange pink and green

Dr Walford Bodie
electrical conjuror, hypnotist and ventriloquist
Cause of death: 30,000 volts

Sanka Members Plastic Arts Exhibition
They were a beautiful couple
Made all their own clothes
Wrote notes in matching notebooks

Zamzam Cola
Drink Pepsi, drink Coke
That must be some kind of joke
You're making a mistake
Drink zamzam, the holy cola
Le cola islamique

Kai Althoff
A dead soldier is preyed upon
By hounds and skeletons
In a snowy Saxon forest
A young boy hides nearby
Soldiers pry the boots off two dead victims
My great-great grandparents in Prussian World War I uniforms
Something bad is about to happen

A couple of young men with scars on their faces
Dressed in boarding school outfits of crimson-and-black
Walk arm in arm under the eerie glare of a street lamp
As a menacing figure leers at them
Something bad is about to happen

Two starving between-the-war types
One is in Alpine garb; the other cowers under sheets
Something bad is about to happen

The car that runs your child over protects mine
The car that runs my child over protects yours
Personally, in a dark world I use their headlights for reading

(Third List of Unused Song Titles)

The Biographies of Famous Mathematicians
A New Portrait of Scotland
The World of Franklin and Jefferson
Post Office Skirt
Lady Fancy Knickers Gee Up Ya Ya
The Etiquette of Quotidian Information Display
Lefthanded Ukranian Woodcutter
Claytones on the Sun Mountain
New Games Prefigure New Societies
Junior Soleil's Code of Honour
Girl Playing A Samisen
Lifeswitch Grandfather
Carpet Warehouse
Eat Fish
Indian erotic miniatures
Harajuku Hair Make Station
O Level Art (Spooky Foxgloves)
Wucius Wong's Principles of Two-Dimensional Design
Squirrel Clitoris
A Visit to the Abbe of Ars
Talky Shrimp

A Scotsman in Malaysia
contact lens
ceiling fan
washing tank
vehicular rubber
hair oil
cold soda drink

Don Quixote Corporation
Don Quixote Corporation
Of the rubber band Durer hare

Lefthandedness, Germanness, Aquarian, a web translation

Sauston des Wesarong
Gureuding naus
Graphis Design T shirt store

Pubs - guns - fishing - cooking - editing

Lemons, capok, deer

Sellotape Flowers
The pub is a good place for editing
Or folding Sellotape flowers

M: because you lack a sense of self, you find those with a self egocentric.

O Level Art with Jake and Dinos
The orchard under two hills
Is heaving obscenely with fruit
The postman passes a patch of purple foxgloves
Waving their heads obscenely about
A little girl triggers obscene anxiety
Alone on her path through the woods
A cottage with roses around the open door
Sits obscene in the centre and broods

I'm so famous I've been forgotten on five continents!

Sing (a capella) the song you wanted to murmur in Rika's ear

Open Letter To Bjork and Matthew Barney
The cars were inside the hill... the grapes were inside the shoe
You guys, you guys, you... guys

Identify with Ebishu, houseworking hamster

Composition according to the shape of idea, brief and unexpanded, lapidary

The Complete Works of Goethe and Kleist for Playstation

Self-portrait as Luther Being Played by the Devil as a Pair of Bagpipes
Painting title by Luke Gottelier
a dollop of custard, a manky carpet and a piece of string

January 12th, 1970

The donkey astride the man
The hare lies down with the cat

Pink Pine Igloo (Opuscule)
The Prussian helmet pinnacle of a Shibuya lampstand
You automatically check your skirt for semen stains

The New Pope
By some trick of the smoke
Some quirk of the vote
Some cosmic joke
They made me the new pope

Are we, as S. Zizek suggests, all turning into sexual monsters? I put my question to a real monster, chomping on a rose

A truly banal song: if you are beautiful, I love you.
(In the manner of Schubert)
If you are nice, I'll befriend you
If you need changing, amend you
If you are beautiful, love you
If you are sexy, I'll fuck you
If you are helpless I'll lend you a hand
If you are powerful, accept your commands

I am the wanderer
Never at rest
Asking myself where? where?
The ghostly answer comes
Your happiness lies there
Where you are not

Sasha Waltz

Comedie Francaise
mixed drama and physical theatre

Paul Bowles
He paid for the tea, the kif was in his head, a carved doorway, a cat with mismatched eyes

I am moving to Mongolia
I am living in a tent
I am riding a horse

have fun but remember
you will be charged 30 euros
if you don't use your reservation
(phrase in a dream)

as i got quieter the world got louder
the birds were deafening
as i explored more like a scientist
the world got expressive like a corny old artist
marcel marceau on a monocycle

i read the biographies of famous mathematicians
became interested in the physics of the curve
began to understand the lnguage of the birds

entrer de plus en plus dans la microscopie
pendant que le monde s'interesse qu'au tauromachie

Killing Punky
(Harm's gran's dog)

Winning friends to influence people

The ant yell
The leprosy of the reeds
The bee flying chestnut

The Monkey and the Bear
I was playing with a monkey and a bear
And sometimes a rabbit
They were people I knew, you see
And I was the woman

Was I laughing?
No, it was dangerous
Playing with the monkey and the bear
Was very dangerous, you see
It was a matter of life and death to me

(Paula Rego)

Give a little wave
As you flounce away
Preposterous (fabulous) popinjay

Some may hate me, few escape me
So completely
You're whodunnit
You're Houdini
It's a small planet
But you're no longer on it
I really can't get my mind around it

In the case of your disappearance I should be Sherlock Holmes
But all I do is blunder round throwing up my hands
I cry, I ask 'But why?'
Like Watson, the buffoon

Perhaps you're on the dark side of the moon?

It's mysterious. I'm curious.
This disappearance has me baffled, stumped.
I'll never see you again. I'm fucked.

I love you forever
Have a happy death

Last Song
Why don't you switch off this music and go and do something less boring instead?

(a canon or round going on for a very long time -- Moondog style -- before the instruments and voice get more and more bored sounding, and the listener is forced to switch it off)

Read part 1 of the album diary, Tati and Me.

Read part 2 of the album diary, In The Soviet Union.

Read part 3 of the album diary, The Reproducer.

Thoughts Index